Clothes Maketh the Man

Again, the genesis for this post comes out of last week’s conference….

Do you make judgments about people based on the way they are dressed? Do you ascribe certain behaviors to people because of what they wear?

I’m quite curious, actually.

I have reached a point in my life where I generally don’t care what others think of my clothing (unless I look like a real tart, or fat, and in that case I expect to hear about it). I admit, I wear things that are quite different. Flamboyant, even. It’s part and parcel of who I am. I use my clothing to express my creative outlet, but I try and do it in such a way as to be “proper”. I wear things that normal people don’t wear. I don’t shop at Talbots, or Ann Taylor…as respectable as I come would be Banana and Macy’s. I buy a lot of stuff online, from alternate clothing people, because it’s different. Only once have I gone to an event and had someone else wear the same shirt! That’s not bad for 33 years!

Oh, I went through all the phases. I had Morticia Addams hair. I had purple hair. I had a bob (my favorite). I had bangs. I had fake nails. I was plump, I got skinny. I went from a “I don’t wear pants ever because they make my ass and stomach look fat” to “I wear jeans all the damn time”. I even owned a pair of Birkenstocks (that was the year I didn’t shave my legs, which was nasty and resembled an overgrown Berber carpet). At one point my eyebrows were so bushy I looked like Sam the Eagle (and when I discovered waxing I started having that no eyebrow look).

I did try, about two years ago, to rework my entire wardrobe. I have suits hanging in my closet that were worn for one year, and then abandoned (even though they still fit). I tried not to color my hair, and wear less makeup, and abandon my extra set of ear piercings. I bought high heels and coordinating purses. I tried to buy things outside of my normal blacks, browns and reds. I bought pink suits, and sky blue suits and other hideous pastels. I wore pantyhose.

And you know what? Can’t turn a sow’s ear into a silk purse. I felt uncomfortable in my own skin. I did not like my new conservative look because it wasn’t really me. I felt stunted creatively and emotionally walking around in someone else’s clothing, like I was pretending to be someone I wasn’t. Those were the years coming out of my marriage where I was going as far away from myself and my history as possible. I just…took it to an extreme.

So now I’ve found my own style, and it’s different. Sometimes people make fun of me, but I get a surprising number of comments from people on my fashion sense. Who knows, they COULD all be making fun of me but I like to think they aren’t.

After all, I see no point in being a lemming…I like being different because I am :-)