I do have to appeal to all right minded and tolerant people everywhere to protest the punishment that looks to be inflicted upon Gillian Gibbons. True, she's escaping the lash, but she is still in prison and will then be deported. I've read some of the comments on news sites, and on other blogs, and I must say I'm appalled.
People have suggested that she isn't at fault, that the children should be punished. So you are going to flog four and five year olds with a whip? How does that teach anyone anything, other than make you look like a backwards, barbaric, inbred moron?
Others have suggested that the teacher deliberately named the bear Muhammad, thus inciting the Wrath of Allah. Balderfreakingdash. As I was perusing Bock's page, I noted that someone else had suggested that they name the bear Jesus. Hello? We live in a country where every sixteenth man's name is Jesus (and that's Hay Zeus for those of you who aren't familiar with Latin American Spanish). No one would care.
What's curious to me is that Gillian teaches in the Sudan. Why anyone in their right mind would want to go to such a...backwards country? A country where letting a bunch of four year olds call a bear Muhammad would have folks practically declaring a fatwah, because this poor lady is out to destroy Islamic culture?
So I propose that we do what any plain ole average joe would do to help out a fellow human being in peril.
We're going to have a bear raiser.
That's right, folks, I want everyone to take a teddy bear, and mail it to President Umar Hassan Ahmad Al-Bashir of Sudan. Or, since it's easier to get an address for this one, courtesy of the United Nations, Sudan's representative to said United Nations Abdalmahmood Abdalhaleem Mohamad.
We're going to call it "Bears for Islam".
Now, onto Sudan.
In my perusing of the world wide internet, I have often used the CIA World Factbook site. It contains lots of lovely, practical information about countries around the globe.
Hm. Sudan's legal system is based on English common law AND Islamic Law. Sudan wasn't always an Arabic nation; it was Christian until the fourteenth century. Only 2.4% of the population lives past the age of 65 - which implies to me that they have no healthcare system and crappy life expectantcies. They have a population of roughly 39 million people. The population contains roughly one male and the arm of another for every female. An average of four kids, two legs and one arm are born to any woman. They have a low rate of HIV infections, but they have some really dangerous other little air, soil and waterbourne beasties to even that out. 71 % of the men over 15 can read; the number drops to 50% for women. A good bit of the population lives below the poverty line. Oh, I love this bit "Sudan is a source country for men, women, and children trafficked for the purposes of forced labor and sexual exploitation". Did I mention that it smells like a military dictatorship, with elections "planned" for next year?
Now I see why the clerics got so excited about Ms. Gibbons naming the bear Muhammad. It has the potential to be international press, which will SURELY distract everyone from the pending (rigged?) election.
That's a good way to get your poor and ignorant population fired up. Beat an outsider.
Lovely. See what we get for trying to do good works?
20071129
20071128
Buy!!! Buy!!!! Buy!!!!
Sorry, I had a purely 1980's corporate greed style moment, ala Michael Douglas...Have you ever noticed that his hair and his face seem to be...well, frozen? I mean, have you ever seen the man's hair move?
Just asking.
What I was going to say...courtesy of my father, I have had the pleasure of listening to one of the best CD sets EVER.
Now, you need to like jazz...like Dixieland Jazz...and you need to like "American" music....
It's "Going Home: A Tribute to Fats Domino"
A sampler of the who's who on the playlist:
Elton John: Blueberry Hill (and he's not his normal freaky gay self here. Reminds me of Madmen Across the Water - when I liked him, and he wasn't a pop shill sell out).
Bonnie Raitt and John Cleary - I'm In Love Again/All By Myself - the voice I WISH I had!
Robert Plant with the Soweto Gospel Choir - Valley of Tears
Willie Nelson - I Hear You Knocking - very rockabilly.
Bruce Hornsby - Don't Blame It On Me - the piano in this is incredible...like "Beat Me Daddy Eight to the Bar"...boogie woogie...and damn the beat makes me want to tap my feet.
Dr. John - Don't Leave Me This Way
One day, readers, I'll switch to a blog that lets me upload song snippets for your listening pleasure. I'm in a fine mood listening to this. Truly fine.
Just asking.
What I was going to say...courtesy of my father, I have had the pleasure of listening to one of the best CD sets EVER.
Now, you need to like jazz...like Dixieland Jazz...and you need to like "American" music....
It's "Going Home: A Tribute to Fats Domino"
A sampler of the who's who on the playlist:
Elton John: Blueberry Hill (and he's not his normal freaky gay self here. Reminds me of Madmen Across the Water - when I liked him, and he wasn't a pop shill sell out).
Bonnie Raitt and John Cleary - I'm In Love Again/All By Myself - the voice I WISH I had!
Robert Plant with the Soweto Gospel Choir - Valley of Tears
Willie Nelson - I Hear You Knocking - very rockabilly.
Bruce Hornsby - Don't Blame It On Me - the piano in this is incredible...like "Beat Me Daddy Eight to the Bar"...boogie woogie...and damn the beat makes me want to tap my feet.
Dr. John - Don't Leave Me This Way
One day, readers, I'll switch to a blog that lets me upload song snippets for your listening pleasure. I'm in a fine mood listening to this. Truly fine.
If I Ruled the World:
It would only rain on weekdays, when one is forced to be in the office.
All essential “girl” products would be tax free.
You’d just have a national sales tax, and not an income tax.
Anyone with a base salary of $400,000 or more should be required to explain personally to each individual he/she lays off why said person deserves to retain his/her job (and gross salary) more than the person laid off.
You’d have ONE cleaning product for everything (have you looked beneath your sink? What is all that shit FOR????)
There would be a market for sweaters woven out of Golden Retriever hair.
A family of elves would reside in my house…elves who liked nothing more than to vacuum daily!
And they’d have some cousins named Yard Gnomes…who liked to rake leaves and clean gutters!
Dogs would leave the room to fart, and not crawl under my bed in the middle of the night for the express pleasure of saturating the room with the scent of dead and partially digested squirrel.
Every day would be pizza day!
One would have to take an IQ test to: drive, have a child, run for office.
Banks would stop charging me money for the pleasure of holding onto my money and lending it out to other people.
People would stop killing each other in the name of…whatever religion/conflict/issue arises each day.
Hmmm…I’m sure I’ll think of others. LG? Meg? Pandora? Princess Fred? Bock? Anyone? Hallloooooooo
All essential “girl” products would be tax free.
You’d just have a national sales tax, and not an income tax.
Anyone with a base salary of $400,000 or more should be required to explain personally to each individual he/she lays off why said person deserves to retain his/her job (and gross salary) more than the person laid off.
You’d have ONE cleaning product for everything (have you looked beneath your sink? What is all that shit FOR????)
There would be a market for sweaters woven out of Golden Retriever hair.
A family of elves would reside in my house…elves who liked nothing more than to vacuum daily!
And they’d have some cousins named Yard Gnomes…who liked to rake leaves and clean gutters!
Dogs would leave the room to fart, and not crawl under my bed in the middle of the night for the express pleasure of saturating the room with the scent of dead and partially digested squirrel.
Every day would be pizza day!
One would have to take an IQ test to: drive, have a child, run for office.
Banks would stop charging me money for the pleasure of holding onto my money and lending it out to other people.
People would stop killing each other in the name of…whatever religion/conflict/issue arises each day.
Hmmm…I’m sure I’ll think of others. LG? Meg? Pandora? Princess Fred? Bock? Anyone? Hallloooooooo
Providence Canyon
Georgia’s “Little Grand Canyon”
There’s bear in them thar hills!
And I just liked the way the dawn hit this spiderweb…what can I say?
My!
So much to comment on, but as other bloggers have beaten me to the punch, I will keep the editorial short.
Lashing someone not of your religion for allowing your children (presumably of your religion) to violate a religious law by committing the sin of idolatry (naming a teddy bear Muhammad)? Verdict: Bad! Continue to make the rest of the world think you are a bunch of murdering, teacher beating fruitcakes! Hire a PR person!
Can you imagine that interview?
Allah: So, what would you say to the press if one of my worshippers walked into a day care center and blew up thirty children and five teachers because they were infidels?
PR Person: Hm…well, I think we’d have to say that we took a proactive step to remove a threat to our organization, wouldn’t you?
Allah: Hey, that’s kind of catchy! I think I like that a lot better than the other guy’s answer…all he could come up with was “They were Jews or Jesus worshippers, right?” You’ve got the job! Now….here’s your pitchfork and your forked tail. The cloven feet are on backorder, and should be here in about six weeks.
Just Daft.
I love religion, I really do. It used to represent the way to maintain social and moral order (desert law, the Catholic empire, etc)…and as other religions have kind of moved past their barbaric roots, more insular religions seem to stay put. And it’s an interesting way to study what values people have had throughout history. Example: an eye for an eye. Today, if you rob my house, and I go rob yours…we both go to jail. We aren’t smitten dead, nor do your inactions cancel mine. We have this little thing called law…that moderates our behavior, and those laws are based on social mores and a sense of one’s inalienable rights. An eye for an eye…to me, speaks of desert law, at a time when there was no one governing body and it was each man (or woman) for himself. The Old Testament (to me) reads like a survival manual: Chapter Six: How to survive a Great Flood, Chapter Five: How to survive a Plague of Locusts.
Anyhow, rambling, but ALL ABOUT CONTEXT.
Allah doesn’t give a fiddlers duck that a bunch of kids named a bear in his honor. In fact, he’s probably flattered.
So much to comment on, but as other bloggers have beaten me to the punch, I will keep the editorial short.
Lashing someone not of your religion for allowing your children (presumably of your religion) to violate a religious law by committing the sin of idolatry (naming a teddy bear Muhammad)? Verdict: Bad! Continue to make the rest of the world think you are a bunch of murdering, teacher beating fruitcakes! Hire a PR person!
Can you imagine that interview?
Allah: So, what would you say to the press if one of my worshippers walked into a day care center and blew up thirty children and five teachers because they were infidels?
PR Person: Hm…well, I think we’d have to say that we took a proactive step to remove a threat to our organization, wouldn’t you?
Allah: Hey, that’s kind of catchy! I think I like that a lot better than the other guy’s answer…all he could come up with was “They were Jews or Jesus worshippers, right?” You’ve got the job! Now….here’s your pitchfork and your forked tail. The cloven feet are on backorder, and should be here in about six weeks.
Just Daft.
I love religion, I really do. It used to represent the way to maintain social and moral order (desert law, the Catholic empire, etc)…and as other religions have kind of moved past their barbaric roots, more insular religions seem to stay put. And it’s an interesting way to study what values people have had throughout history. Example: an eye for an eye. Today, if you rob my house, and I go rob yours…we both go to jail. We aren’t smitten dead, nor do your inactions cancel mine. We have this little thing called law…that moderates our behavior, and those laws are based on social mores and a sense of one’s inalienable rights. An eye for an eye…to me, speaks of desert law, at a time when there was no one governing body and it was each man (or woman) for himself. The Old Testament (to me) reads like a survival manual: Chapter Six: How to survive a Great Flood, Chapter Five: How to survive a Plague of Locusts.
Anyhow, rambling, but ALL ABOUT CONTEXT.
Allah doesn’t give a fiddlers duck that a bunch of kids named a bear in his honor. In fact, he’s probably flattered.
20071127
Domestic News
Citi yesterday announced a pending layoff of 45,000 employees, about 15% of their staff of 320,000.
Today, it is announced that they have accepted a cash bailout from the Saudi’s.
I don’t think I have to tell you what I think of that – just continuing fallout from the subprime industry. And we aren’t done yet. I think it will take us two years to crawl out of the hole that those unscrupulous, predatory, one step above payday lender bankers that sold loans to folks who could never afford to pay.
Secondly, Baby Grace. Her mother beat her with belts, held her head underwater, threw her across the room into a wall – this child is two. When the child died, no medical care was sought. The mother lied and said that a social worker from Ohio had taken the child, when in reality she was stuffed into a Rubbermaid type tub in another part of the house, and then she was dumped in the bay.
Why did this mother and her boyfriend or husband (and apparent murdering derelict) beat her child to death? She had loving grandparents, and a biological father who loved her also. Why not give her to someone who cared? Why beat her to death?
I also like the way the articles all mention that the mother and her current paramour met while playing World of Warcraft online. As if playing a video game makes one commit infanticide?
Today, it is announced that they have accepted a cash bailout from the Saudi’s.
I don’t think I have to tell you what I think of that – just continuing fallout from the subprime industry. And we aren’t done yet. I think it will take us two years to crawl out of the hole that those unscrupulous, predatory, one step above payday lender bankers that sold loans to folks who could never afford to pay.
Secondly, Baby Grace. Her mother beat her with belts, held her head underwater, threw her across the room into a wall – this child is two. When the child died, no medical care was sought. The mother lied and said that a social worker from Ohio had taken the child, when in reality she was stuffed into a Rubbermaid type tub in another part of the house, and then she was dumped in the bay.
Why did this mother and her boyfriend or husband (and apparent murdering derelict) beat her child to death? She had loving grandparents, and a biological father who loved her also. Why not give her to someone who cared? Why beat her to death?
I also like the way the articles all mention that the mother and her current paramour met while playing World of Warcraft online. As if playing a video game makes one commit infanticide?
20071126
20071122
20071121
Reprinting John Sugg's column this week from Creative Loafing. Here's hoping I don't get sued for copyright infringement...but I'm giving proper props - Atlanta's Creative Loafing, John Sugg, published 11.21.07. Not everyone agrees with Sugg's politics, but the end message here is what is important.
Here goes:
"Transcript of "Larry King Live" segment, Nov. 13:
LARRY KING: We have a very special guest this evening. I've been trying to get him on the show for a long time, but he has a very hectic schedule. Events in the backwater state of Georgia have prompted our guest to insist on coming on tonight's show. We're also joined by presidential adviser Lou Cypher in Washington, D.C. Lou, you there?
LOU CYPHER: Yes, Larry. Thank you. I'd like the viewers to know that I'm a man of wealth and taste. And, that my ... um ... advice has laid many a soul to waste. Pleased to meet you.
KING: What is your role in the Bush White House?
CYPHER: Well, Dick Cheney is one of my ... uh, I guess you'd say "disciples."
KING: That's impressive. Do you know what his plans are after the next election?
CYPHER: Oh, I'll try to work him into the Ninth Circle.
KING: Ninth Circle?
CYPHER: It's a little club I run.
KING: Now for our very special guest. Here he is, someone who needs little introduction, God. God, or do I call you Lord? Jehovah? Big Guy?
GOD: Al is fine.
KING: Al?
GOD: Short for Almighty.
KING: Uh-huh. And if you look at that monitor over there, you can see our other guest, Lou Cypher.
GOD: We've met before, many ages ago. Hi, Lou. Shrewd work you're doing, casting confusion about global warming.
CYPHER: Hi, Al. Devilishly high praise, considering the source. But I'm even prouder of Iraq. Can't wait for Iran.
KING: Well, let's talk about Georgia, a state ...
CYPHER: I went down to Georgia once.
GOD: Do I have to listen to this story again? He was in some silly fiddlin' contest. Big deal. He didn't even win.
KING: Fellows, fellows. Al, I understand the governor there – I can't recall his name. Buddy? Bubba? Roy Bob?
GOD: Sonny.
KING: You know him, then?
GOD: Yes, I have a mild affliction called omniscience.
KING: OK, this Sonny, then, I hear he's offered you a job.
GOD: That's what the news reports say. He announced it to a crowd at the state Capitol today. I'm a little annoyed that he didn't ask me first. I've pushed the "smite" button on people for doing less.
KING: What is it he wants you to do for Georgia?
GOD: I guess you could call the job "State Supreme Water Czar." I have been in the plumbing business before, way back on the second day of Creation. Or was it the first?
KING: So what does this Sonny person want you to do as water czar?
GOD: I think he wants me to make it rain.
KING: Could you do that?
GOD: Boy, could I. Way back when, I made it rain for 40 days and 40 nights. Kinda got carried away. But you've asked the wrong question. It's not so much could I make it but would I make it rain?
KING: OK, would you?
GOD: Yes and no.
KING: Yes and no?
GOD: Yes, yes and no. I'd better explain. You see, Larry, everything happens because I will it. I am the totality of all that was and is and will be, world without end, yadda yadda, amen.
CYPHER: And they say I have a big ego.
KING: So would you make it rain because Sonny asks?
GOD: I might. But, then, I might make it not rain because Sonny asks. That's how I work. You see, I've been sending signs to Georgia for years. Those people there claim they read my book, and it says pretty plainly toward the end, "Do not harm the earth or the sea or the trees." So, what do they do? They try to cut down every tree they see. They've darn near ruined the land. And I didn't put a lot of water in that area. They know that. Chicago got a lot of water, but I gave them lousy winters. Georgia got a nice climate, but I sort of ran out of water in the north part. Do you think that Sonny character pays attention? Hell ...
CYPHER: Excuse me?
GOD: ... no. Let's keep growing, he says. He's turning paradise into hell.
CYPHER: Music to my ears.
KING: Is there anything Sonny could do to make it rain?
GOD: It's not politically correct to do human sacrifice any longer. If it were, I'd tell Sonny to line up the developers and sharpen the knives. Otherwise, he should quit all of this pious acting. If he shred his well-tailored suits, put ashes on his head, and if he and that band of cutthroats they call the Legislature spent, oh, about 20 years flagellating themselves, I might be impressed. Anything less, forget it. And another thing I noticed: Sonny was propped up at his little show by an outfit called the Christian Coalition. This is a good time to announce that my kid is filing a federal lawsuit against the group for trademark infringement. Christian? Hah. All they talk about is homosexuals. They're obsessed. You know what my son said about gays? Nada, zilch. Why don't people pay attention?
CYPHER: I'm very of fond of them.
KING: Al, your name is being invoked in Georgia in an investigation of two people who claim they work for you, Eddie Long and Creflo Dollar.
CYPHER: My main men.
GOD: Read what my boy said 2,000 years ago. If all you care about is getting rich, you're not moving into my neighborhood. Lou's place has plenty of room, but the air conditioning is always on the fritz. I just read a poll that said 12 percent of Americans went hungry in 2006. And I gave that nation so much! My son said to take care of the poor, the children, the outcasts. You think they're doing that in Georgia? You think Sonny and Eddie and Creflo give a hoot for the poor children, the hungry families? I feel like whipping up some plagues and sending them.
KING: You heard it here first, folks. Georgia better repent – or bad things are going to happen.
CYPHER: I'm so excited."
Here goes:
"Transcript of "Larry King Live" segment, Nov. 13:
LARRY KING: We have a very special guest this evening. I've been trying to get him on the show for a long time, but he has a very hectic schedule. Events in the backwater state of Georgia have prompted our guest to insist on coming on tonight's show. We're also joined by presidential adviser Lou Cypher in Washington, D.C. Lou, you there?
LOU CYPHER: Yes, Larry. Thank you. I'd like the viewers to know that I'm a man of wealth and taste. And, that my ... um ... advice has laid many a soul to waste. Pleased to meet you.
KING: What is your role in the Bush White House?
CYPHER: Well, Dick Cheney is one of my ... uh, I guess you'd say "disciples."
KING: That's impressive. Do you know what his plans are after the next election?
CYPHER: Oh, I'll try to work him into the Ninth Circle.
KING: Ninth Circle?
CYPHER: It's a little club I run.
KING: Now for our very special guest. Here he is, someone who needs little introduction, God. God, or do I call you Lord? Jehovah? Big Guy?
GOD: Al is fine.
KING: Al?
GOD: Short for Almighty.
KING: Uh-huh. And if you look at that monitor over there, you can see our other guest, Lou Cypher.
GOD: We've met before, many ages ago. Hi, Lou. Shrewd work you're doing, casting confusion about global warming.
CYPHER: Hi, Al. Devilishly high praise, considering the source. But I'm even prouder of Iraq. Can't wait for Iran.
KING: Well, let's talk about Georgia, a state ...
CYPHER: I went down to Georgia once.
GOD: Do I have to listen to this story again? He was in some silly fiddlin' contest. Big deal. He didn't even win.
KING: Fellows, fellows. Al, I understand the governor there – I can't recall his name. Buddy? Bubba? Roy Bob?
GOD: Sonny.
KING: You know him, then?
GOD: Yes, I have a mild affliction called omniscience.
KING: OK, this Sonny, then, I hear he's offered you a job.
GOD: That's what the news reports say. He announced it to a crowd at the state Capitol today. I'm a little annoyed that he didn't ask me first. I've pushed the "smite" button on people for doing less.
KING: What is it he wants you to do for Georgia?
GOD: I guess you could call the job "State Supreme Water Czar." I have been in the plumbing business before, way back on the second day of Creation. Or was it the first?
KING: So what does this Sonny person want you to do as water czar?
GOD: I think he wants me to make it rain.
KING: Could you do that?
GOD: Boy, could I. Way back when, I made it rain for 40 days and 40 nights. Kinda got carried away. But you've asked the wrong question. It's not so much could I make it but would I make it rain?
KING: OK, would you?
GOD: Yes and no.
KING: Yes and no?
GOD: Yes, yes and no. I'd better explain. You see, Larry, everything happens because I will it. I am the totality of all that was and is and will be, world without end, yadda yadda, amen.
CYPHER: And they say I have a big ego.
KING: So would you make it rain because Sonny asks?
GOD: I might. But, then, I might make it not rain because Sonny asks. That's how I work. You see, I've been sending signs to Georgia for years. Those people there claim they read my book, and it says pretty plainly toward the end, "Do not harm the earth or the sea or the trees." So, what do they do? They try to cut down every tree they see. They've darn near ruined the land. And I didn't put a lot of water in that area. They know that. Chicago got a lot of water, but I gave them lousy winters. Georgia got a nice climate, but I sort of ran out of water in the north part. Do you think that Sonny character pays attention? Hell ...
CYPHER: Excuse me?
GOD: ... no. Let's keep growing, he says. He's turning paradise into hell.
CYPHER: Music to my ears.
KING: Is there anything Sonny could do to make it rain?
GOD: It's not politically correct to do human sacrifice any longer. If it were, I'd tell Sonny to line up the developers and sharpen the knives. Otherwise, he should quit all of this pious acting. If he shred his well-tailored suits, put ashes on his head, and if he and that band of cutthroats they call the Legislature spent, oh, about 20 years flagellating themselves, I might be impressed. Anything less, forget it. And another thing I noticed: Sonny was propped up at his little show by an outfit called the Christian Coalition. This is a good time to announce that my kid is filing a federal lawsuit against the group for trademark infringement. Christian? Hah. All they talk about is homosexuals. They're obsessed. You know what my son said about gays? Nada, zilch. Why don't people pay attention?
CYPHER: I'm very of fond of them.
KING: Al, your name is being invoked in Georgia in an investigation of two people who claim they work for you, Eddie Long and Creflo Dollar.
CYPHER: My main men.
GOD: Read what my boy said 2,000 years ago. If all you care about is getting rich, you're not moving into my neighborhood. Lou's place has plenty of room, but the air conditioning is always on the fritz. I just read a poll that said 12 percent of Americans went hungry in 2006. And I gave that nation so much! My son said to take care of the poor, the children, the outcasts. You think they're doing that in Georgia? You think Sonny and Eddie and Creflo give a hoot for the poor children, the hungry families? I feel like whipping up some plagues and sending them.
KING: You heard it here first, folks. Georgia better repent – or bad things are going to happen.
CYPHER: I'm so excited."
Driving up here yesterday, I spent a good deal of time sitting in bumper to bumper traffic on I85 and wondering what was going on. Dad and I spent some time on the phone looking for alternate routes, etc, to no avail. Between Toccoa and the boder, things were a mess. I wasn't impatient, or angry, or doing boneheaded traffic maneuvers (you people that drive up the emergency lane, I know who you are!!!), just merely resigned to another trip all cocked up due to traffic.
You know the bridge "into" South Carolina, or departing from, depending on your point of view? As you cross Lake Hartwell (which looks bad, to be honest, but it's been lower) going southbound, there is one last bridge, and on the other side is a big sign with a peach that says some kind of "Welcome to the Pray for Rain State".
Seriously, it says "Welcome to Georgia".
Well, that particular bridge has always scared me. It's narrow. It's a freaking bridge, and there is no wiggle room. I've driven over it (or ridden) and always been struck by a fear that THIS bridge would suddenly buckle and I would plunge to my death.
Anyhow...seven car pileup involving two tractor trailers. As I drove by (traffic was stopped by SLED in all directions), I noticed what looked to be a shiny new Volvo missing it's roof. I had the windows down, and as I was driving by what I'm euphemistically calling the "cleaning crew" happened to hear me say, quite loudly "holy shit!" How could anyone have survived that wreck?
And then I started to cry.
The remainder of the drive I was consumed with the thoughts of the people who were in that car. Was it a family, with two small children in the backseat on their way to Grandma's? Two friends on their way home for a weekend of free food? Mom and Dad driving to visit their daughter in college? I had decided that it was a family, with two small children, and that the parents were dead (you could excuse the flight of fancy if you'd seen the car), and how that would color their entire lives. And I asked for whomever listens to such requests to bless them.
I got here, logged on to the UNSECURE (dad, c'mon) wireless network, and immediately started Googling a Toccoa paper, an Anderson paper, the AJC...anything.
Would you believe they lived? "Stable but serious condition"
So there, people...when you complain about a traffic backup, or think about how much you hate your in laws, or get caught up in family squabbles, think about those two people. Your life doesn't suck that much.
You know the bridge "into" South Carolina, or departing from, depending on your point of view? As you cross Lake Hartwell (which looks bad, to be honest, but it's been lower) going southbound, there is one last bridge, and on the other side is a big sign with a peach that says some kind of "Welcome to the Pray for Rain State".
Seriously, it says "Welcome to Georgia".
Well, that particular bridge has always scared me. It's narrow. It's a freaking bridge, and there is no wiggle room. I've driven over it (or ridden) and always been struck by a fear that THIS bridge would suddenly buckle and I would plunge to my death.
Anyhow...seven car pileup involving two tractor trailers. As I drove by (traffic was stopped by SLED in all directions), I noticed what looked to be a shiny new Volvo missing it's roof. I had the windows down, and as I was driving by what I'm euphemistically calling the "cleaning crew" happened to hear me say, quite loudly "holy shit!" How could anyone have survived that wreck?
And then I started to cry.
The remainder of the drive I was consumed with the thoughts of the people who were in that car. Was it a family, with two small children in the backseat on their way to Grandma's? Two friends on their way home for a weekend of free food? Mom and Dad driving to visit their daughter in college? I had decided that it was a family, with two small children, and that the parents were dead (you could excuse the flight of fancy if you'd seen the car), and how that would color their entire lives. And I asked for whomever listens to such requests to bless them.
I got here, logged on to the UNSECURE (dad, c'mon) wireless network, and immediately started Googling a Toccoa paper, an Anderson paper, the AJC...anything.
Would you believe they lived? "Stable but serious condition"
So there, people...when you complain about a traffic backup, or think about how much you hate your in laws, or get caught up in family squabbles, think about those two people. Your life doesn't suck that much.
Today's Headline:
Prostate Cancer harder to Spot in Obese Men
Pardon me, but...no shit sherlock.
If you can't even SEE your genitals, how the hell are you supposed to know that something is wrong?
Do you put your finger up your own ass and cough?
Mom points out that this is up there with the "I didn't know I was pregnant, I just thought I had a stomachache!"
Remember that bad advice from the seventies for women's empowerment and sex?
"Take your mirror and examine your vulva"!!!
Prostate Cancer harder to Spot in Obese Men
Pardon me, but...no shit sherlock.
If you can't even SEE your genitals, how the hell are you supposed to know that something is wrong?
Do you put your finger up your own ass and cough?
Mom points out that this is up there with the "I didn't know I was pregnant, I just thought I had a stomachache!"
Remember that bad advice from the seventies for women's empowerment and sex?
"Take your mirror and examine your vulva"!!!
20071120
20071119
Y'all are too cute! Thanks muchly for the birthday wishes.
Have done feck all this weekend. Cleaned out. Changed sheets. Changed sheets again. Got electric blanket from grandmom. Ran around, didn't do anything I meant to do this weekend. Getting ready to head up to NC tomorrow morning, have cleaned off the dog blanket and gotten the car ready to be loaded. I keep telling Maddy and Zoe that they are going to their "cousins". I'm not sure they understand, but they seem mighty excited. Argued with Charter over equipment I returned via UPS two weeks ago, but that they are still trying to bill me for.
I'm taking the camera...so this time I'll actually take pictures. I think I'm going to go to Kings Mountain and the Daniel Stowe Botanical Gardens while I'm up there, and possibly stop in Asheville on the way home for some photos - I have GOT to get some shots of the Biltmore.
Anyway, that's about it.
Have done feck all this weekend. Cleaned out. Changed sheets. Changed sheets again. Got electric blanket from grandmom. Ran around, didn't do anything I meant to do this weekend. Getting ready to head up to NC tomorrow morning, have cleaned off the dog blanket and gotten the car ready to be loaded. I keep telling Maddy and Zoe that they are going to their "cousins". I'm not sure they understand, but they seem mighty excited. Argued with Charter over equipment I returned via UPS two weeks ago, but that they are still trying to bill me for.
I'm taking the camera...so this time I'll actually take pictures. I think I'm going to go to Kings Mountain and the Daniel Stowe Botanical Gardens while I'm up there, and possibly stop in Asheville on the way home for some photos - I have GOT to get some shots of the Biltmore.
Anyway, that's about it.
20071117
Hey, stop it!
Not talking to you guys, Maddy has an obssession with the laptop. She ate Mr. Manners HalfLife 2 discs at some point during last night, and a coat hanger and a box of Kleenex today.
Just dropping in to say hello.
Tonight is a Johnny Cash "Live at Folsom Prison" night...musically speaking, of course.
Not talking to you guys, Maddy has an obssession with the laptop. She ate Mr. Manners HalfLife 2 discs at some point during last night, and a coat hanger and a box of Kleenex today.
Just dropping in to say hello.
Tonight is a Johnny Cash "Live at Folsom Prison" night...musically speaking, of course.
20071116
You know, vomit is an interesting thing. In a purely analytical way, it's rather interesting to see what your body digests and how, and how long things can sit in your stomach without being digested when your stomach is unhappy. At about midnight last night, I threw up yesterday's lunch (baked potato with cheese and bacon) and some saltines I'd eaten when I got home (perfect for nausea, you know). Rather nasty to see chunks of bacon, coke, and peices of saltine in one's puke. Then every time I'd burp, it would be liquid. Nasty!!
At least I have an early warning system. I'm very rarely surprised by a sudden need to puke. Ten minutes, last night...I was asleep on the couch, and woke up just to vomit.
Sorry, was just distracted by the ad for "Enchanted Evening"...I confess, it looks...almost amusing.
Monday is my birthday. I expect most everyone will forget, as is usually the case. I get screwed by being so close to Thanksgiving - whatever plans are occuring for Thanksgiving always overshadow my birthday. So I've learned not to expect much. It becomes just another day right around one's twenty first birthday.
At least I have an early warning system. I'm very rarely surprised by a sudden need to puke. Ten minutes, last night...I was asleep on the couch, and woke up just to vomit.
Sorry, was just distracted by the ad for "Enchanted Evening"...I confess, it looks...almost amusing.
Monday is my birthday. I expect most everyone will forget, as is usually the case. I get screwed by being so close to Thanksgiving - whatever plans are occuring for Thanksgiving always overshadow my birthday. So I've learned not to expect much. It becomes just another day right around one's twenty first birthday.
20071115
This really upset me when I first heard about it, and it upsets me now.
Georgia doesn't have great Safe Haven laws, but we do have some laws. A parent wishing to relinquish their newborn can give the child up within a week of birth to a hospital or a health department without being charged. California has the best Safe Haven laws - in fact, there's a woman there who runs a program called Garden of Angels. Don't go Googling that unless you REALLY want to cry. This lady started the program after seeing a news story about a newborn who died after being flung out onto the highway - the parents were never identified, and so she contacted local authorities and arranged for the child's burial. Today, she has a foundation that does this, and that works with hospitals, churchs, fire and police deparments to coordinate safe haven programs for newborns. And she still runs the burial program - they name the infants, bury them, and give them markers.
Instead, some poor soul wiped their baby down...their baby who still had the umbilical cord attached, placed it in a bag, and placed it on the side of the road...hoping that someone would hear, maybe, or see the bag, and find the child...and now the child is dead, and buried in an unmarked pauper's grave. Someone who didn't know any better, who didn't have access to a doctor, or to a hospital, or who was afraid and did the only thing she could think of. What does this woman...or girl...or child, even feel like now? She has to know that her son is dead, and what does she feel? She wanted someone to find him, she wanted someone to take care of him (unwanted children end up in dumpsters, in trash cans, not carefully placed on the sidewalk). How much fear did she live in that this was her only option?
I can't say enough about educating everyone, of any class, of any racial group, of any immigrant status, about their rights in this country. I can't believe this small child had to die, I just can't.
Georgia doesn't have great Safe Haven laws, but we do have some laws. A parent wishing to relinquish their newborn can give the child up within a week of birth to a hospital or a health department without being charged. California has the best Safe Haven laws - in fact, there's a woman there who runs a program called Garden of Angels. Don't go Googling that unless you REALLY want to cry. This lady started the program after seeing a news story about a newborn who died after being flung out onto the highway - the parents were never identified, and so she contacted local authorities and arranged for the child's burial. Today, she has a foundation that does this, and that works with hospitals, churchs, fire and police deparments to coordinate safe haven programs for newborns. And she still runs the burial program - they name the infants, bury them, and give them markers.
Instead, some poor soul wiped their baby down...their baby who still had the umbilical cord attached, placed it in a bag, and placed it on the side of the road...hoping that someone would hear, maybe, or see the bag, and find the child...and now the child is dead, and buried in an unmarked pauper's grave. Someone who didn't know any better, who didn't have access to a doctor, or to a hospital, or who was afraid and did the only thing she could think of. What does this woman...or girl...or child, even feel like now? She has to know that her son is dead, and what does she feel? She wanted someone to find him, she wanted someone to take care of him (unwanted children end up in dumpsters, in trash cans, not carefully placed on the sidewalk). How much fear did she live in that this was her only option?
I can't say enough about educating everyone, of any class, of any racial group, of any immigrant status, about their rights in this country. I can't believe this small child had to die, I just can't.
Work: our holiday party, due to the layoffs, is postponed until the beginning of the year. The new party theme is "Employee Appreciation". What the fuck?
Weather: still no rain, but at least it's cooler.
House: Maddy ate the strap off my new shoe last night. Just the strap. Damn dog.
Traffic: If you have on your blinker, and there is a right hand turn lane, and you are turning right, kindly get out of my way. The mood I'm in this week, my little Jeep will happily perform a PIT manuever and shove your tiddling little import ass out of the way. Also, Alpharetta PD, I have a complaint!! The ramp at the end of Mansell is flooded daily during rush hour with soul less idiots who go to the end of the ramp in the left hand turn lanes, only to turn right (bypassing the thirty cars in line). Why is there NEVER a cop there? Yesterday, a Cadillac (I think) SUV did it, and a Mercedes did it RIGHT in front of me. I wanted to put my car in park and go ask them if they had any sense of courtesy or respect...although that might get me punched, so I thought the better of it. Seriously though...Alpharetta, you wanna make some money, get busy.
Local: lastly, my favorite soundbite out of the news today....Consumers Using Less Water will Still Have Higher Costs as Utilities Look to Offset Losses by Raising Rates. Greedy Bastards!
Weather: still no rain, but at least it's cooler.
House: Maddy ate the strap off my new shoe last night. Just the strap. Damn dog.
Traffic: If you have on your blinker, and there is a right hand turn lane, and you are turning right, kindly get out of my way. The mood I'm in this week, my little Jeep will happily perform a PIT manuever and shove your tiddling little import ass out of the way. Also, Alpharetta PD, I have a complaint!! The ramp at the end of Mansell is flooded daily during rush hour with soul less idiots who go to the end of the ramp in the left hand turn lanes, only to turn right (bypassing the thirty cars in line). Why is there NEVER a cop there? Yesterday, a Cadillac (I think) SUV did it, and a Mercedes did it RIGHT in front of me. I wanted to put my car in park and go ask them if they had any sense of courtesy or respect...although that might get me punched, so I thought the better of it. Seriously though...Alpharetta, you wanna make some money, get busy.
Local: lastly, my favorite soundbite out of the news today....Consumers Using Less Water will Still Have Higher Costs as Utilities Look to Offset Losses by Raising Rates. Greedy Bastards!
20071114
Resonance
"Somehow my soul seems suddenly free" Sydney Lanier
"Each morning it is her face that replaces the darkness.
In me she has drowned a young girl, and in me an old woman
Rises toward her day after day, like a terrible fish" Sylvia Plath
"At evening when the lamp is lit,
around the fire my parents sit;
They sit at home and talk and sing,
And do not play at anything.
Now, with my little gun, I crawl
All in the dark along the wall,
And follow round the forest track
Away behind the sofa back.
There, in the night, where none can spy,
All in my hunter's camp I lie,
And play at books that I have read.
These are the hills, these are the woods,
These are my starry solitudes;
And there the river by whose brink
The roaring lions come to drink.
I see the others far away
As if in firelit camp they lay,
And I, like to an Indian scout,
Around their party prowled about.
So when my nurse came in for me,
Home I return across the sea,
And go to bed with backward looks
At my dear land of story-books." Robert Louis Stevenson
I won't bore you with eternal quotes of T.S. Eliot, whom I adore. Really, in the room where women come and go....
"Each morning it is her face that replaces the darkness.
In me she has drowned a young girl, and in me an old woman
Rises toward her day after day, like a terrible fish" Sylvia Plath
"At evening when the lamp is lit,
around the fire my parents sit;
They sit at home and talk and sing,
And do not play at anything.
Now, with my little gun, I crawl
All in the dark along the wall,
And follow round the forest track
Away behind the sofa back.
There, in the night, where none can spy,
All in my hunter's camp I lie,
And play at books that I have read.
These are the hills, these are the woods,
These are my starry solitudes;
And there the river by whose brink
The roaring lions come to drink.
I see the others far away
As if in firelit camp they lay,
And I, like to an Indian scout,
Around their party prowled about.
So when my nurse came in for me,
Home I return across the sea,
And go to bed with backward looks
At my dear land of story-books." Robert Louis Stevenson
I won't bore you with eternal quotes of T.S. Eliot, whom I adore. Really, in the room where women come and go....
It's Not Nice Weather for Ducks
LG reminded me of something I wanted to blog about….
Praying for rain? Ok, I give you some credit. Yesterday we had clouds, but no rain. I’m sure it rained SOMEWHERE…maybe you could be a wee bit more specific in your prayerful requests? It certainly was a slow news day yesterday if the coverage of our esteemed Governor on his knees beseeching God for a little for a little two parts hydrogen one part oxygen cumulus action. Well, ok, a lot of cumulus action…I’m thinking like the rain we had when Hurricane Opal blew through in…93? 94?
Let me paint a picture for you non believers about the real damage the lack of water (lack of proper civic planning) is going to do to our fine metropolitan area.
If the Army Corp of Engineers continues to release water at their present rate from Lake Lanier, it is predicted we will be out of water within a 30 – 45 days. This doesn’t mean that the lake will be bone dry – this means that water will be in the lake, in the deepest pockets, that cannot be pumped out of said deep pockets and gotten to Buford Dam. This water cannot be pumped anywhere without great expense, and that tiny little bit of water will be all that remains to support the ecosystem that has grown up around the lake.
By the way, the lake was named for famed Georgia Poet Sydney Lanier (most famous, arguably, for “The Marshes of Glynn”). For a nice little bit of history, go here: http://lanier.sam.usace.army.mil/history.htm. I really want to speculate and say that a very early Stuart Woods book was also “fictionally written” about Lanier – “Under the Lake”…that when I first read scared the poop out of me.
Ironically, Lanier and the Corp (which manages the lake) have won three awards for the “Best Managed Lake” (90, 97, ’02).
Anyway, point being: if the Corp continues to release the water at it’s regular rate, not only will us regular folk be out of water, but the mussels the Corp is working so valiantly to protect will also be out of water as well. People can always, at great expense, truck water in, but mussels cannot. Ergo, the mussels are going to die eventually anyway. Evolve, bitches!
So what happens to we humans?
The options aren’t pretty. We can truck water in (expensive), build a desalinization plant and a few hundred miles of pipe and plants (really expensive, and time consuming). We can do what other, smaller towns have done and go on rationing – water is only turned on in your neighborhood between six and ten each night, and then turned off. Or you can pray for rain. In fact, I’d be willing to sacrifice a chicken to get some rain. Remember when November was the rainy month?
Here’s a list of who can still water, and who shouldn’t be able to: golf courses (stupid sport), landscaping companies, people on well water (why? This still depletes the aquifer), car washes, complexes of any kind with “public areas” like apartment complexes, businesses (this depends on what part of town you live in), state parks, federal parks, and any municipal building/park/land.
The State has talked to this issue for years – talked to, and done nothing. Sat on their fat asses down in the Capital building and debated stupid shit like…hm…whether or not to rename a highway after another one of their big butted, moneyed cronies. Or what the airport should be called. Seriously? We pay you guys to talk about naming the frigging airport?
The real problem is going to be the economic impact. Not to our wallets as individuals, but to the State itself. Who wants to build a plant, open a business, relocate an office to a state that is on water restriction? Sounds like poor house management to me, and if I were a major firm (BMW, Kia, etc) I certainly wouldn’t open a plant in a state with such issues. If they can’t manage a natural resource, how on earth can they be expected to manage anything else? And for the businesses that are here, how will they absorb the cost of the modifications they will have to make to accommodate a water ration? Who is going to pay for those new low flow toilets in the ladies room on the second floor of the BOA Tower? BOA will pay, certainly, but you will in the end too. I’m sure that companies will find a way to offset that cost in physical infrastructure by reducing their workforce. Then you have higher unemployment, and people who can’t shower or flush their toilets until six pm.
Again, rampant growth, blatant disregard for the folks downstream, lax enforcement of laws and watering bans,
We don’t have a lot of rain. We only have man made lakes. We only have a few rivers that we share with our neighbors. We’re screwed! Thanks, Mr. Perdue, Mr. Barnes, Mr. Miller and Mr. Harris for your gracious and wise stewardship of our state!
Praying for rain? Ok, I give you some credit. Yesterday we had clouds, but no rain. I’m sure it rained SOMEWHERE…maybe you could be a wee bit more specific in your prayerful requests? It certainly was a slow news day yesterday if the coverage of our esteemed Governor on his knees beseeching God for a little for a little two parts hydrogen one part oxygen cumulus action. Well, ok, a lot of cumulus action…I’m thinking like the rain we had when Hurricane Opal blew through in…93? 94?
Let me paint a picture for you non believers about the real damage the lack of water (lack of proper civic planning) is going to do to our fine metropolitan area.
If the Army Corp of Engineers continues to release water at their present rate from Lake Lanier, it is predicted we will be out of water within a 30 – 45 days. This doesn’t mean that the lake will be bone dry – this means that water will be in the lake, in the deepest pockets, that cannot be pumped out of said deep pockets and gotten to Buford Dam. This water cannot be pumped anywhere without great expense, and that tiny little bit of water will be all that remains to support the ecosystem that has grown up around the lake.
By the way, the lake was named for famed Georgia Poet Sydney Lanier (most famous, arguably, for “The Marshes of Glynn”). For a nice little bit of history, go here: http://lanier.sam.usace.army.mil/history.htm. I really want to speculate and say that a very early Stuart Woods book was also “fictionally written” about Lanier – “Under the Lake”…that when I first read scared the poop out of me.
Ironically, Lanier and the Corp (which manages the lake) have won three awards for the “Best Managed Lake” (90, 97, ’02).
Anyway, point being: if the Corp continues to release the water at it’s regular rate, not only will us regular folk be out of water, but the mussels the Corp is working so valiantly to protect will also be out of water as well. People can always, at great expense, truck water in, but mussels cannot. Ergo, the mussels are going to die eventually anyway. Evolve, bitches!
So what happens to we humans?
The options aren’t pretty. We can truck water in (expensive), build a desalinization plant and a few hundred miles of pipe and plants (really expensive, and time consuming). We can do what other, smaller towns have done and go on rationing – water is only turned on in your neighborhood between six and ten each night, and then turned off. Or you can pray for rain. In fact, I’d be willing to sacrifice a chicken to get some rain. Remember when November was the rainy month?
Here’s a list of who can still water, and who shouldn’t be able to: golf courses (stupid sport), landscaping companies, people on well water (why? This still depletes the aquifer), car washes, complexes of any kind with “public areas” like apartment complexes, businesses (this depends on what part of town you live in), state parks, federal parks, and any municipal building/park/land.
The State has talked to this issue for years – talked to, and done nothing. Sat on their fat asses down in the Capital building and debated stupid shit like…hm…whether or not to rename a highway after another one of their big butted, moneyed cronies. Or what the airport should be called. Seriously? We pay you guys to talk about naming the frigging airport?
The real problem is going to be the economic impact. Not to our wallets as individuals, but to the State itself. Who wants to build a plant, open a business, relocate an office to a state that is on water restriction? Sounds like poor house management to me, and if I were a major firm (BMW, Kia, etc) I certainly wouldn’t open a plant in a state with such issues. If they can’t manage a natural resource, how on earth can they be expected to manage anything else? And for the businesses that are here, how will they absorb the cost of the modifications they will have to make to accommodate a water ration? Who is going to pay for those new low flow toilets in the ladies room on the second floor of the BOA Tower? BOA will pay, certainly, but you will in the end too. I’m sure that companies will find a way to offset that cost in physical infrastructure by reducing their workforce. Then you have higher unemployment, and people who can’t shower or flush their toilets until six pm.
Again, rampant growth, blatant disregard for the folks downstream, lax enforcement of laws and watering bans,
We don’t have a lot of rain. We only have man made lakes. We only have a few rivers that we share with our neighbors. We’re screwed! Thanks, Mr. Perdue, Mr. Barnes, Mr. Miller and Mr. Harris for your gracious and wise stewardship of our state!
20071113
Remember being so excited about something…say, a birthday, or a trip to the beach, or the lake, or summer vacation, or Christmas, that you’d count the days down on the calendar?
Padding down the forbidden hallway at the forbidden hour of six am on a Saturday to watch your favorite cartoon? And then watching television when the parents weren't paying attention all day on Saturday (Kung Fu Theater!).
Sliding down said hallway in your footie pajamas after you’d heard your parents go to bed to see if Santa had come yet?
What about thinking to yourself that you wanted it to snow, but if you prayed for snow, you wouldn’t get it, so you would pray that it wouldn’t snow, in the secret hopes that it would actually snow?
Do you still make wishes on stars, on the candles on your birthday cake, on an eyelash when it falls from your lashes?
Do you get excited when you go to the mailbox and actually have real mail, not a bill or a catalog or some other solicitation, that’s really addressed, in a real person’s handwriting, to you?
Trying to catch a snowflake on your tongue?
What about having an actual record player, and playing the crap out of one particular song as loud as your stereo (headphones) would allow? I was partial to the Reader's Digest Sets - I think I had Greatest Hits of the Century...and would listen to "The Charleston" repeatedly and dream of being a glamorous flapper and having Gatsby fall in love with me.
Getting all dressed up, loaded in the car with your sisters and your books and your tape player, to go to Grandmother’s for Thanksgiving? And finally getting to sit at the adult table, and realizing that the kid table or the card table in the sunroom was MUCH more fun than the grown up table.
I wanted to be an adult my entire childhood. I was the serious child, the neighborhood babysitter, the one who looked after everyone else. As I grew older, my teenage friends all made fun of me and said I was like a thirty three year old in a fifteen year old’s body. Now that I’m getting ready to leave thirty three, I wish I could go back and tell my younger self to be in less of a hurry about everything. I wish I had known to savor the small moments (first rays of a winter sunset, Venus rising over the incoming tide, sailing through an untouched marsh, having a glass of wine and watching the twinkling lights of the Christmas tree, quiet moments at the grave of Grandmother Carol), and to take my time making decisions (I suffer from the Ragan disease of “must do it now-it-iveness”).
The small moments are what add up to make your life rich. The bigger things that seem so important, or so catastrophic, mean nothing in the face of a thousand happy memories...something I need to learn to live by.
As my middle sister said once in childhood (and is now a part of family lore)
"Don't worry, it will winse out"
It all does eventually.
Padding down the forbidden hallway at the forbidden hour of six am on a Saturday to watch your favorite cartoon? And then watching television when the parents weren't paying attention all day on Saturday (Kung Fu Theater!).
Sliding down said hallway in your footie pajamas after you’d heard your parents go to bed to see if Santa had come yet?
What about thinking to yourself that you wanted it to snow, but if you prayed for snow, you wouldn’t get it, so you would pray that it wouldn’t snow, in the secret hopes that it would actually snow?
Do you still make wishes on stars, on the candles on your birthday cake, on an eyelash when it falls from your lashes?
Do you get excited when you go to the mailbox and actually have real mail, not a bill or a catalog or some other solicitation, that’s really addressed, in a real person’s handwriting, to you?
Trying to catch a snowflake on your tongue?
What about having an actual record player, and playing the crap out of one particular song as loud as your stereo (headphones) would allow? I was partial to the Reader's Digest Sets - I think I had Greatest Hits of the Century...and would listen to "The Charleston" repeatedly and dream of being a glamorous flapper and having Gatsby fall in love with me.
Getting all dressed up, loaded in the car with your sisters and your books and your tape player, to go to Grandmother’s for Thanksgiving? And finally getting to sit at the adult table, and realizing that the kid table or the card table in the sunroom was MUCH more fun than the grown up table.
I wanted to be an adult my entire childhood. I was the serious child, the neighborhood babysitter, the one who looked after everyone else. As I grew older, my teenage friends all made fun of me and said I was like a thirty three year old in a fifteen year old’s body. Now that I’m getting ready to leave thirty three, I wish I could go back and tell my younger self to be in less of a hurry about everything. I wish I had known to savor the small moments (first rays of a winter sunset, Venus rising over the incoming tide, sailing through an untouched marsh, having a glass of wine and watching the twinkling lights of the Christmas tree, quiet moments at the grave of Grandmother Carol), and to take my time making decisions (I suffer from the Ragan disease of “must do it now-it-iveness”).
The small moments are what add up to make your life rich. The bigger things that seem so important, or so catastrophic, mean nothing in the face of a thousand happy memories...something I need to learn to live by.
As my middle sister said once in childhood (and is now a part of family lore)
"Don't worry, it will winse out"
It all does eventually.
Things
I did buy "Other People's Love Letters" and that is a wonderful little read. The letters range from really cute to really sad (the letter from the soldier to his wife giving birth to their son). Definite coffee table material.
Damn. I'm going to be driven out of my own bedroom by rancid dog farts.
Also following Bock's recommendation (well, and the New Yorker), I picked up the Krauss/Plant cd - and that is really fantastic. Also picked up Amy Whino..wait, Winehouse...I haven't popped that in yet, but I'll let you know the verdict once I do.
My sushi place is trying to kill me. The tuna rolls get hotter and hotter every week. I ate over an hour ago and my mouth is STILL on fire. I might have to take up drinking so I can eat my dinner.
This layoff today has really thrown me for a loop. I got myself all worked up with the Worst Case Scenario, and then had such an energy crash when I got home that it put me in a bad mood. A Thumb Sucking Bad Mood...if that makes sense.
Damn. I'm going to be driven out of my own bedroom by rancid dog farts.
Also following Bock's recommendation (well, and the New Yorker), I picked up the Krauss/Plant cd - and that is really fantastic. Also picked up Amy Whino..wait, Winehouse...I haven't popped that in yet, but I'll let you know the verdict once I do.
My sushi place is trying to kill me. The tuna rolls get hotter and hotter every week. I ate over an hour ago and my mouth is STILL on fire. I might have to take up drinking so I can eat my dinner.
This layoff today has really thrown me for a loop. I got myself all worked up with the Worst Case Scenario, and then had such an energy crash when I got home that it put me in a bad mood. A Thumb Sucking Bad Mood...if that makes sense.
Well, had a bit of a fright today.
Surprise announcement, totally kept under wraps...we did layoffs at work.
I hate layoffs before Christmas. I was laid off once two weeks before Christmas, and it was completely miserable...until I realized that although I'd only been with the company three months I was getting three months of severance. No wonder the company went bankrupt! Ironically, it was the old BellSouth Internet contract that a former friend works on now for Accenture.
Not knowing if I fell in the impacted group, and seeing that the impacts fell at all levels and performance levels in the organizations (learned later in the day)...I had a mini freak out session this morning. What if I did get laid off? It's happened to me twice before, but the luxury of being both young and, well, poor, is that it matters less to lose a job. You have less of a nut to worry about finding...you only need to find that one small acorn to get you through the winter. The older you are, and the more shit you acquire, the worse it is!
So in the way of all true scorpio women, I am sitting at work this morning immediately examining the Worst Case Scenario and wondering where I'd get the cash to file bankruptcy!
So:
I will bust ass and finish school next year.
I will work harder at actual work.
I will finish all my house projects and get out of that house. Or rent it out. Or burn it down. Or SOMETHING! I tried to rent out a room - you should have SEEN what responded to my ad. Conversely, I can stay in it, save my cash, and continue to fix things piecemeal as I've been doing. Siding, siding, siding.
Do I look like a roof monkey to you?
Moderate freak out session. Must be approaching birthday blues.
Surprise announcement, totally kept under wraps...we did layoffs at work.
I hate layoffs before Christmas. I was laid off once two weeks before Christmas, and it was completely miserable...until I realized that although I'd only been with the company three months I was getting three months of severance. No wonder the company went bankrupt! Ironically, it was the old BellSouth Internet contract that a former friend works on now for Accenture.
Not knowing if I fell in the impacted group, and seeing that the impacts fell at all levels and performance levels in the organizations (learned later in the day)...I had a mini freak out session this morning. What if I did get laid off? It's happened to me twice before, but the luxury of being both young and, well, poor, is that it matters less to lose a job. You have less of a nut to worry about finding...you only need to find that one small acorn to get you through the winter. The older you are, and the more shit you acquire, the worse it is!
So in the way of all true scorpio women, I am sitting at work this morning immediately examining the Worst Case Scenario and wondering where I'd get the cash to file bankruptcy!
So:
I will bust ass and finish school next year.
I will work harder at actual work.
I will finish all my house projects and get out of that house. Or rent it out. Or burn it down. Or SOMETHING! I tried to rent out a room - you should have SEEN what responded to my ad. Conversely, I can stay in it, save my cash, and continue to fix things piecemeal as I've been doing. Siding, siding, siding.
Do I look like a roof monkey to you?
Moderate freak out session. Must be approaching birthday blues.
20071108
Spam, Spam, Spam
Echoes of Monty Python in my head! Aaaaaarrrrgggghhhh
Just like everyone else in the internet world, I get a lot a great deal of Spam. Enormous amounts, in fact, although it's safe to say that my daily amount of Spam hasn't yet caught up to the amount of catalogs I recieve between...oh, October and December? Imagine! Catalogs for things you didn't even know existed! Or that you wanted! Whatever will you do? (straight into the recyling bin, if you please, Mr. Mailman!)
No, we inhabitants of the little ole world known as the world wide web innundated with Spam. In terms of...parts per million...my neighborhood's occupants are probably receiving as much Spam now as....the number of mosquitos you find in my front yard in July. Come on, you've been in my yard, you know you need a beekeeper suit to get from your car to my front door!
Some Spam can be informative:
Boston Proper: Sexy Winter Sweaters on Sale!!
Bloomingdale's: Welcome to our 25% off and more long Weekend Sale
Public Radio Market: Great New Books for Music Lovers
Some Spam is just, well, Spam:
Joe's Warehouse: Doony and Booke Bags in half off!!!
P*n&S: All HERBAL Viiiiiaagggraaaa!
And some Spam, well, you wonder how you got it:
"Eliza!!! Keisha05 at BlackPlanet has viewed your page and has left you comment!"
WTF?
Now I looked at this email, and it really is to me...to my actually, correctly spelled, legitimate email address. I've never heard of that site, been to that site, and can't think of anyone who (seriously) would sell my demographic information to a marketer who could be that, well, stupid!
I think there is an internet Imp out there who has it in for me. Last year it was the continual porn emails. Now I've moved on to porn from friend sites! Help!!!
Just like everyone else in the internet world, I get a lot a great deal of Spam. Enormous amounts, in fact, although it's safe to say that my daily amount of Spam hasn't yet caught up to the amount of catalogs I recieve between...oh, October and December? Imagine! Catalogs for things you didn't even know existed! Or that you wanted! Whatever will you do? (straight into the recyling bin, if you please, Mr. Mailman!)
No, we inhabitants of the little ole world known as the world wide web innundated with Spam. In terms of...parts per million...my neighborhood's occupants are probably receiving as much Spam now as....the number of mosquitos you find in my front yard in July. Come on, you've been in my yard, you know you need a beekeeper suit to get from your car to my front door!
Some Spam can be informative:
Boston Proper: Sexy Winter Sweaters on Sale!!
Bloomingdale's: Welcome to our 25% off and more long Weekend Sale
Public Radio Market: Great New Books for Music Lovers
Some Spam is just, well, Spam:
Joe's Warehouse: Doony and Booke Bags in half off!!!
P*n&S: All HERBAL Viiiiiaagggraaaa!
And some Spam, well, you wonder how you got it:
"Eliza!!! Keisha05 at BlackPlanet has viewed your page and has left you comment!"
WTF?
Now I looked at this email, and it really is to me...to my actually, correctly spelled, legitimate email address. I've never heard of that site, been to that site, and can't think of anyone who (seriously) would sell my demographic information to a marketer who could be that, well, stupid!
I think there is an internet Imp out there who has it in for me. Last year it was the continual porn emails. Now I've moved on to porn from friend sites! Help!!!
this is now my favorite news story of the day. It beats Tuesday's "cow falling on car" story.
Man tasers would be car jacker only to be shot five times at a range of two feet and lives.
How shitty is that?
The dude he tasered got away.
So residents of College Park: if you find a man with two little round burn marks in his skin, turn his ass in! Robbery and attempted murder are good starting charges!
Man tasers would be car jacker only to be shot five times at a range of two feet and lives.
How shitty is that?
The dude he tasered got away.
So residents of College Park: if you find a man with two little round burn marks in his skin, turn his ass in! Robbery and attempted murder are good starting charges!
20071107
Finland
I don't understand what could be so wrong in someone's life that they could pick up a gun, walk into a school, and start shooting.
I think the person in question must have a hole where their heart should be.
I think the person in question must have a hole where their heart should be.
20071106
Presto!
Wouldn't David Copperfield like to make himself disappear?
How much of a loser do you have to be to write a script for your employees to use to "pre seduce" women you pull out of your audience?
Hi, My Name Is David Copperfield. I'm a hairpiece wearing magician. I own an island in the Bahamas. Wanna screw?
Time to do one of those magic tricks and vanish!
Wouldn't David Copperfield like to make himself disappear?
How much of a loser do you have to be to write a script for your employees to use to "pre seduce" women you pull out of your audience?
Hi, My Name Is David Copperfield. I'm a hairpiece wearing magician. I own an island in the Bahamas. Wanna screw?
Time to do one of those magic tricks and vanish!
Letter my father has submitted to Newsweek...read on:
" I am sickened over this country’s use of waterboarding as an interrogation technique, and I am thoroughly disgusted over the Administration’s assertions that it is not torture. A person is tied to a board, blindfolded, and has a gag shoved deep into the mouth. Water is then poured onto the victim’s face, resulting in a feeling of drowning and dying. To say the least, this would cause feelings of severe mental distress. Persons subjected to waterboarding also experience lasting mental effects, real, extreme pain, lung and brain damage, broken bones, and even death. Face the facts, waterboarding IS torture. It has been used as a method of torture since the Spanish Inquisition. Its adherents include Japan and Germany during World War II, the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia in the ‘60’s, and now, America.
I grew up during the Cold War when we faced the very real threat of total annihilation. The America I grew up in was not so afraid of its enemies that it had to torture them for information. Now, we are so ruled by fear and hatred that we allow and sanction our government to willingly violate international and United States laws, including the Constitution, in the name of safety. Now, we are so terrorized by our leaders and the press that we permit and even espouse the use of torture to obtain information that is dubious at best. Mr. Bush leers and asserts that America does not torture. But we do. And it is a crime against humanity for which America will answer one day. "
" I am sickened over this country’s use of waterboarding as an interrogation technique, and I am thoroughly disgusted over the Administration’s assertions that it is not torture. A person is tied to a board, blindfolded, and has a gag shoved deep into the mouth. Water is then poured onto the victim’s face, resulting in a feeling of drowning and dying. To say the least, this would cause feelings of severe mental distress. Persons subjected to waterboarding also experience lasting mental effects, real, extreme pain, lung and brain damage, broken bones, and even death. Face the facts, waterboarding IS torture. It has been used as a method of torture since the Spanish Inquisition. Its adherents include Japan and Germany during World War II, the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia in the ‘60’s, and now, America.
I grew up during the Cold War when we faced the very real threat of total annihilation. The America I grew up in was not so afraid of its enemies that it had to torture them for information. Now, we are so ruled by fear and hatred that we allow and sanction our government to willingly violate international and United States laws, including the Constitution, in the name of safety. Now, we are so terrorized by our leaders and the press that we permit and even espouse the use of torture to obtain information that is dubious at best. Mr. Bush leers and asserts that America does not torture. But we do. And it is a crime against humanity for which America will answer one day. "
20071105
Alternate Reality
I have this idea that if there are parallel universes, somewhere, there is a me that is in everyway the complete polar opposite of who I am now.
So let’s see.
If I were in an alternate reality, I think my name would be Jackie, and I’d be missing some front teeth. I’d be living down in the holler in a double wide I inherited from my uncle Hank after he died from liver failure with my high school sweetheart turned husband named Jesse. I’d have boobs, and am enormously fat, and would have no job, and big 80’s style hair. I’d spend my days figuring out how to make different lookin’ meals out of the same old shitty cuts of meat Jesse brought home from the meat processing plant, and struggling to help my sons finish their homework. I’d be pregnant with my third child, and would have given birth to the first two at home, on a mattress we’d have just burned last year on account of being too dirty. I would have never crossed the state line, never seen the ocean, never seen a lake bigger than….Fort Mountain. I’d be smoking Eve Light Menthols, and buying black Miss Clairol to color my hair at home. And smoking while I color my hair. My sons would be fat, having spent any money they could get their hands on buying shit I couldn’t give them, like ding dongs and moon pies. A gourmet meal would be a piece of fish that wasn’t fried, but neither my kids nor my husband would eat it. If this really were a total opposite reality, I’d have a still somewhere on the property, with a couple of coon dogs, and I’d be testing my own wares that I would sell to supplement Jesse’s shitty paycheck. I’d wear overalls, and know how to drive a tractor!
OMG, I think I’m about to have a stroke.
Next!
So let’s see.
If I were in an alternate reality, I think my name would be Jackie, and I’d be missing some front teeth. I’d be living down in the holler in a double wide I inherited from my uncle Hank after he died from liver failure with my high school sweetheart turned husband named Jesse. I’d have boobs, and am enormously fat, and would have no job, and big 80’s style hair. I’d spend my days figuring out how to make different lookin’ meals out of the same old shitty cuts of meat Jesse brought home from the meat processing plant, and struggling to help my sons finish their homework. I’d be pregnant with my third child, and would have given birth to the first two at home, on a mattress we’d have just burned last year on account of being too dirty. I would have never crossed the state line, never seen the ocean, never seen a lake bigger than….Fort Mountain. I’d be smoking Eve Light Menthols, and buying black Miss Clairol to color my hair at home. And smoking while I color my hair. My sons would be fat, having spent any money they could get their hands on buying shit I couldn’t give them, like ding dongs and moon pies. A gourmet meal would be a piece of fish that wasn’t fried, but neither my kids nor my husband would eat it. If this really were a total opposite reality, I’d have a still somewhere on the property, with a couple of coon dogs, and I’d be testing my own wares that I would sell to supplement Jesse’s shitty paycheck. I’d wear overalls, and know how to drive a tractor!
OMG, I think I’m about to have a stroke.
Next!
Restrain me, please.
I am itching, absolutely itching to break out my Christmas decorations. Full court press – nativity, outdoor garlands, twinkling lights…I think I might go for an inflatable Santa this year.
Just kidding.
I’ve been listening to Christmas music on the sly for weeks, merrily singing O Little Town of Bethlehem and It Came Upon a Midnight Clear whilst doing dishes or folding ye olde never ending laundry. I’ve half my Christmas presents purchased, although am holding onto fond hopes that retailers will adjust their sales strategy to compensate for miserable third quarter numbers and have DEEP DEEP DISCOUNTS!!!!! during the last few weeks of December to offset all that prior fiscal badness. Hoping, I said, but not counting on it.
The parental units have purchased LilSis’s plane tickets for the festivities; I’ll be delighted to have everyone at my house, and to have a Eliza Family Christmas, rather than the normal circus pony show we’ve enjoyed for the past, oh, 34 years. Sometimes you just want things to be simple; as much as I love to entertain, this is the year I look forward to not cooking for twenty people.
Break in chain of thought.
Isn’t it amazing how one tiny thought can take over your mind, suddenly dominate your thoughts, and take what was going to be an average day and abruptly make your mood very bad?
I am itching, absolutely itching to break out my Christmas decorations. Full court press – nativity, outdoor garlands, twinkling lights…I think I might go for an inflatable Santa this year.
Just kidding.
I’ve been listening to Christmas music on the sly for weeks, merrily singing O Little Town of Bethlehem and It Came Upon a Midnight Clear whilst doing dishes or folding ye olde never ending laundry. I’ve half my Christmas presents purchased, although am holding onto fond hopes that retailers will adjust their sales strategy to compensate for miserable third quarter numbers and have DEEP DEEP DISCOUNTS!!!!! during the last few weeks of December to offset all that prior fiscal badness. Hoping, I said, but not counting on it.
The parental units have purchased LilSis’s plane tickets for the festivities; I’ll be delighted to have everyone at my house, and to have a Eliza Family Christmas, rather than the normal circus pony show we’ve enjoyed for the past, oh, 34 years. Sometimes you just want things to be simple; as much as I love to entertain, this is the year I look forward to not cooking for twenty people.
Break in chain of thought.
Isn’t it amazing how one tiny thought can take over your mind, suddenly dominate your thoughts, and take what was going to be an average day and abruptly make your mood very bad?
20071103
You people are killing me...honestly! LG??? Double wedding??? LOL
I repeat: there are no weddings planned.
Actually, repeat after me: there are no weddings planned!
We've done nothing today. Rather splendid actually. Mr. Manners has been playing with his birthday presents and evidently enjoying them mightly. We did make a trip to a local sporting goods store to swap out a pair of pants (my bad) and headed over to Dreamland for some of Roswell's best bbq (shameless plug). We did pop into Barf, Brats and Beyond - would you believe I don't own one single blanket for my bed? - and it was full of rude people, screaming kids, and long lines. We abandoned our purchases at the front and just left. I am my father's daughter (order's at McDonald's drive thru, gets pissed off at delay, drives off) after all! It was worse than Harry's at nine a.m. on a Saturday!
And after that, haven't done shhhhheeeeeeiiiiiittttt. I'm secretly hoping we'll be eating pizza for dinner. I could seriously massacre a pepperoni pizza. Hmmmm. Salt, fat and cholesterol. Back to organizing my small shared closet in the hopes of eeking out a bit more room for clothing!
Just chilling on a Saturday night!
I repeat: there are no weddings planned.
Actually, repeat after me: there are no weddings planned!
We've done nothing today. Rather splendid actually. Mr. Manners has been playing with his birthday presents and evidently enjoying them mightly. We did make a trip to a local sporting goods store to swap out a pair of pants (my bad) and headed over to Dreamland for some of Roswell's best bbq (shameless plug). We did pop into Barf, Brats and Beyond - would you believe I don't own one single blanket for my bed? - and it was full of rude people, screaming kids, and long lines. We abandoned our purchases at the front and just left. I am my father's daughter (order's at McDonald's drive thru, gets pissed off at delay, drives off) after all! It was worse than Harry's at nine a.m. on a Saturday!
And after that, haven't done shhhhheeeeeeiiiiiittttt. I'm secretly hoping we'll be eating pizza for dinner. I could seriously massacre a pepperoni pizza. Hmmmm. Salt, fat and cholesterol. Back to organizing my small shared closet in the hopes of eeking out a bit more room for clothing!
Just chilling on a Saturday night!
20071102
People Say the Darndest Things
A dear family member called me today to expressly tell me that she felt it would be a wonderful Christmas present to her if Mr. Manners and I got married at Christmas.
No pressure there!
No pressure there!
Well, in the continued categories of stupid abuses of power....
A local area cop has tasered a fourteen year old girl whom he attempted to chastise for swearing while she was trick or treating. When he asked her to stop (reminding her that there were other, younger children nearby), she swore at him more (as one does when young and stupid). He touched her in an effort to get her to stop, and she tried to punch him. A fourteen year old girl trying to punch a grown man! Not only does the kid end up in handcuffs, but she ends up being tasered!!!
Tasered!!!
WTF?
A grown man has to taser a child? Was this child 200 lbs? Were this child's friends helping gang up on this poor off duty cop?
You know, it's rude to swear in front of other people's children but not, to my knowledge, illegal (although it might violate some old obscenity clause). So...had the cop minded his own business and left the girl alone.
Poor judgement all around!
A local area cop has tasered a fourteen year old girl whom he attempted to chastise for swearing while she was trick or treating. When he asked her to stop (reminding her that there were other, younger children nearby), she swore at him more (as one does when young and stupid). He touched her in an effort to get her to stop, and she tried to punch him. A fourteen year old girl trying to punch a grown man! Not only does the kid end up in handcuffs, but she ends up being tasered!!!
Tasered!!!
WTF?
A grown man has to taser a child? Was this child 200 lbs? Were this child's friends helping gang up on this poor off duty cop?
You know, it's rude to swear in front of other people's children but not, to my knowledge, illegal (although it might violate some old obscenity clause). So...had the cop minded his own business and left the girl alone.
Poor judgement all around!
20071101
If Wishes Were Horses
When you blow out the candles on a cake,
Star Light Star Bright, First Star I see tonight,
Or just lay in your bed dreaming.....
What do you wish for?
Star Light Star Bright, First Star I see tonight,
Or just lay in your bed dreaming.....
What do you wish for?
Happy All Saint's Day
Hope everyone enjoyed all their trick and treating beasties last night. Had about fifteen kids...not much by the normal standards of my neighborhood, but cul de sac living is an odd thing. Most of the parents were dressed up as well, which was cool. My favorites were the accessorized princesses...accessorized with striped turtlenecks and tights with stars or stripes (to keep warm). So precious!
Still very tired, and have a chill.
And otherwisely, nothing else to say.
Still very tired, and have a chill.
And otherwisely, nothing else to say.
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