In the last year and pocket full of change worth of months, I have felt so different about things, about work, about life, about money, about myself.

I was asking a co-worker about an agenda for a regular weekly meeting yesterday. No agenda, no web-ex, no dial in. Very unlike him. He didn't answer me for several hours, and when he did, he informed me that he had a death in the family the day before, and apologized for the delay, and told me he'd be working the rest of the day.

I told this co-worker that I thought it was horrible he was working. And I explained that I felt that way too, before. I got the call that granddad was being taken to the hospital, and that the doctors felt like he had another day or two, and that I should be able to take my time, and so instead of leaving right then and there I felt like it was more important to stay at work and take care of my CAREER than my family.

So instead of going and holding my granddad's hand being with him when he died I stayed here to fire someone who put her husband's bail on the company credit card.

I've had some personal low moments, but that was pretty low.

Some things aren't conscious choices, but over time you realize that you are on the wrong path.

I was on the wrong path. I had a closet full of suits and stupid business woman work clothes. I wanted so badly to be on that executive path, and I really thought that the only way to get there was to just sacrifice everything.

And maybe it is.

But if that's the cost...it's a price I'm not willing to pay.