Of course I oversleep.

Then I manage to plonk myself mid throat with a lawnmower handle (don't ask). Immediate loss of air followed by boohooage.

Then in an attempt not whack someone else's car, I shut the truck door on my head. I shut door and scream inside truck in sheer frustration (something like: fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck well, really, I'm kidding, but that's what I was saying in my head).

There are literally days when it does NOT pay to get out of bed.