Forgiveness

There comes a time in everyone's life where you have to stop carrying around the sins of your past like a piece of sackcloth, smearing yourself with ashes every few months like some ultra penitent Franciscan. I admit quite fully that I am human, that I am not infallible, and that I make mistakes.

I am not the sum of my mistakes, and neither is anyone else.

I do not judge others by their mistakes; what gives you the right to judge me by mine?

The details of my marriage and divorce are things I will never again speak of to another human being. I am fully aware of my own sins, of my ex-husband’s sins, and I do not need to be “pre judged” by anyone else in the future. I am not proud of my marriage, I am not proud of the person I became. By the way, I punish myself enough, thank you, and do not need anyone else’s help in this matter.

Only now have I gotten to a point in life where I feel good about myself. I am relatively content with my house, with myself, with my family, and with my career. I have made peace with my past. It is what it is. And I’m proud of the life I have carved out for myself, issue laden as it is, it is still mine, and I made it for myself.

Ironically, this has taught me that full disclosure of one’s past is going to have negative repercussions no matter whom you tell. It makes you have a lot of faith in humanity, it truly does.